Let Your Soul Sparkle

Sparkle Every Day: Don't Let Social Media Or Reality TV Fool Ya

• Jaclyn Sanguinetti

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Speaker 1:

What's up? Sparkle Squad Welcome to Sparkle Every Day. Okay, today is gonna be kind of a funny, random Thing, but it's just something I was thinking about in the shower and I need to tell it to you. So I am a Sucker, for love is blind. I don't know why. Because every single season I tell myself Don't do this again, dude, don't waste your time like this again. And even this season I was like one episode in and I texted my friend Alex and I was like I can't do this again. It's such a waste of time. I don't know what I'm thinking. And I Texted to her like with the intention of like I'm not watching this anymore. And then I ended up Leaving my TV on while I was working on my laptop and I overheard like some stuff that was like popping off and I was like up, I'm sucked right back into this shit, like how did that happen?

Speaker 1:

But one of the things I wanted to bring up was and I hope this is not if you, if you've been watching it, you're really invested and you don't want to know anything. I mean, I'm not gonna say anything about couples or anything. It's not gonna be any hot takes right now, you guys, but like if you're one of those like die-hards, like you can't hear any opinion or anything, this might be an episode to hold off on. So, anyways, one of the things that I have noticed and it just made me think hmm, you know, like things that make you go, hmm. So I have seen multiple like posts and Just commentary about how some of these people were not truly available in real life, like they had relationships going on. One guy in particular they're saying he had no intention of getting married. He just like went on the show to kind of like have his like 15 minutes and thought it would get him somewhere in life. And you know, all these like speculations are coming out now about the cast and I think that that kind of happens every every time. Right, like stuff comes out. Oh, this person was like still kind of like in talks with their you know significant other still, or trying to work on things or whatever. But on the show these people are like the people that you think like, oh my god, like they're definitely gonna be something, and then when they all get back into the real world, they're absolutely nothing. Right. Like they, they die off fast. Right, they start hard and they die hard, which is kind of honestly I always think about that in dating in general is like when you got the gate really, really hard. Those Relationships tend to be the ones that, um, you know, and real fast too. But that's not the point of this episode.

Speaker 1:

But it made me think how, when it comes to so many things on social media, reality TV, all of this, you think, wow, like, what a life these people have. Or you know God, this girl, she lost so much weight so fast and all she was doing was this and that's what I'm doing. So why am I not getting results? Or you know, wow, this person, like she made all this money really quickly and like, gosh, I wish I could do that. Whatever it would be, guys Like I don't know what you're like, what you would see on social media that would you would want, right, maybe someone got pregnant and you've been trying to get pregnant for a long time and you're really discouraged, or whatever it is.

Speaker 1:

Anyways, life is fucking fake on social media and it's not like a hot take and it's not like we need to be reminded of this, but I still think we do need to be reminded of this. Even as adult women, we need to be reminded of this, because I think it's so easy to see that someone else, like their life, is working out In one direction or another and get so down on ourselves as to why ours are not and we do not know the ins and outs of someone else's life. Like just this week I'm not even kidding you guys I am in that like progesterone, like part where in the HRT that I'm on where the progesterone is kind of high, it's the week before my period and I have that like doom and gloom feeling like every single day. I'm being completely honest, like I have anxiety. I am just like kind of like when I'm alone I feel like I'm like barely hanging on to like not crying, like I'm just in a fucking mood and a funk this week and I know it's just where I'm at in my cycle, but everything feels like harder and bigger and all of that stuff.

Speaker 1:

Do you think I go to work, to the salon and tell my clients when they're like, hey, how's it going? Do you think I say, oh, my god, it's been a horrible week? Like every single day I want to cry like no, I'm like, oh, things are good. I'm going on a hike this weekend, like I say the highlight reel because I'm working right like do you want to go get your hair done and have someone be like, well, actually things are fucking fucked, you know? No, no, don't get me wrong, you guys, I also am very real. I'm not trying to act like I'm faking it all of the time for people, because that's not who I am and I don't think I need to put that disclaimer. I think you all know me very well to know that. But I just mean people aren't gonna tell you the hard stuff all of the time.

Speaker 1:

I've said this from the very start. When I was getting divorced, I didn't tell any of my clients for the entire you know duration of the beginning of the split, because I one didn't know what was going to happen. You know there was a lot of unknowns for me. I was very left in the dark on quite a lot of stuff and kind of waiting to figure things out, and so I didn't want to talk about it with people. I also didn't. I wanted work to be the one place that I could go and not think or talk about it, because it was consuming me, and so it was like I don't know. I think we moved apart in August and in December when clients were like, what are you guys doing for Christmas? I'm like, oh, we're getting divorced, like literally, you guys. So all of those people that saw me from August to December, they'd be like, oh, how's this, how's that? I'd be like, fine, good, fine, good, and it wasn't fine and good, but I wasn't ready to talk about it.

Speaker 1:

So when you guys are assuming that everybody is okay or on social media, you know everyone's life is roses and all these people are in these happy relationships and life is grand. I think we really need to take that with a grain of salt and just know that everybody is living life, you know, and everybody is doing the best that they can. And is that to say when you see people happy on social media, they're not happy? No, I know a lot of people that are happy. I'm telling you guys, I'm happy individual as well. But you know, the week before my period I'm apparently not a happy individual and I think that's pretty common and I give myself some gray story in that week. So you also won't see me on social media the week before my period when I feel like that, being like, hey guys, I'm having the best week ever, because I'm not going to lie to you guys. I'm going to check in, maybe pop on my stories and be like man, life is life in this week. I'll see you guys next week, like whatever it is. You know we're all post things just like randomly, but I'm not going to come on and lie about things ever, so you guys can know that right out the gate.

Speaker 1:

But you know, when people have a really big audience, when people are just, you know, have something to prove, I can't promise you that they're not going to lie, you know. I mean, these couples clearly have a lot of issues, a lot of issues to work on and you can see that they just want this so bad. They want to be that couple that makes it through. And you guys, there's no prize for being the couple that makes it. If you are going to be miserable, I will promise you that you know like you're just hurting yourself. I would much rather live a life that feels good to me, that nobody sees, than outwardly portray something that I'm not, that is not who I am, and faking the funk, because that life just like fucking sucks. Those four months or whatever.

Speaker 1:

It was August, yeah, about like four months, whatever. That I had to fake it to my clients. Actually, I feel like in the long run kind of hurt me more because it just was exhausting, but I also just didn't know what. You know, it was like a fight or flight moment and I just was like I can't, I can't talk about this at work right now. I can't do this every day.

Speaker 1:

And you guys would be surprised there was some people that I would say like I'm getting divorced and I can't talk about it, and they'd be like oh my God, like what's going on? And like did you miss that? I can't talk about it part. You know, like people, just you know they're like just sometimes don't get it. They I had clients literally start crying in my chair. Then I'm consoling the client about my shit because they're just so devastated for me. And, oh my God, my heart goes out to those clients, those people that love you enough that they're hurt. When you're hurt, like those are like your people and I loved them.

Speaker 1:

But it was a lot to do in that moment, right, there's reasons why we protect our peace around things and so I don't want to like take that away. I'm not saying like you have to be your 100% self in front of everybody all the time, you know. But I want you guys to understand that everyone is doing that, okay? So when you're on social media and you see, like gosh, this girl like seems like she's lost all this weight so effortlessly and like it's happened so fast for her and she's, you know, like just whatever, just no, that's not the case. It's not the case for anybody. Everybody has the stuff that they're going through and everybody is doing the best that they can and everybody's gone through something, and so we just need to extend everybody a little bit of grace. So that's all I got for you today. I will talk to you soon. Bye.